Suidice: A mother writes

A Chairde,

I just thought I would put pen to paper in order to thank you for your article on suicide. I am a brokenhearted mother who lost my son to suicide just over a year ago.

I would like to say to the parents interviewed in last week's edition, please get some help. I myself went to a group shortly after my son died and if it wasn't for that group I wouldn't be writing this letter today. I would have been with my son. My group gave me a lot of support and the friends I have made, I am grateful for.

I can say what I want or need in my group and I can say what I feel without anyone telling me what to do or how I should feel. We are all people who feel the same pain and we can identify with one another.

My group also helped me to cope with other members of my family and my younger children. I feel that if I am strong then, in turn, it helps them to cope. My faith has also helped me a lot and I have many good friends outside my group, including my priest and doctor, who have been really helpful.

For many weeks I didn't leave the house because of the stigma attached to suicide but I believe we now have to forget about such a stigma and get it out in the open if we want to save our young people.

I would appeal to any young person out there, if they are feeling down or depressed, to please, please seek help.

Talk to someone, anyone, and please to everyone reading this, please try to be as good a listener as possible.

I didn't get any indication of my son's death; he was so full of life and loved by everyone who knew him.

On the occasion when I did leave the house, I saw and heard young people pointing at me and saying 'that's her whose son hung himself'. It hurt me a lot. I already had this big hole in my heart and some people didn't make it any easier. I would advise anyone against pointing the finger at anyone, because I never thought it would knock on my door. Like all parents who have lost a child, it doesn't matter which way we lost them and as the saying goes, 'mothers hold their children's hands for a little while but they hold their hearts forever'.

Thank you for reading this and I hope it gives someone, somewhere a little bit of hope.

A heartbroken mother but a grateful one for the memories my son has left me